What is so interesting to me is that many of the blogs on wheat free/gluten free living devote themselves to baked goods. I have found that once you remove the baked goods (read BREAD) and cakes, etc. out of your life, your cravings for them leave as well. But ... when you re-introduce the gluten free substitutes, those cravings return. Certainly not as intense as the original, but still, a craving all the same.
And I am not interested in cravings! I have really enjoyed the past few weeks of not NEEDING to eat, or for that matter, even really wanting to. There have been too many years devoted to my appetite. I am just as happy to forget about it!
Over Thanksgiving I ate more gluten-free bread than I have in a long time, and of course when I discovered that I didn't gain any weight, my first thought was, it is FINE to eat it. I went shopping at Trader Joe's this morning with only a small piece of gluten free bread smeared with almond butter as sustenance, and I was shoving all sorts of gluten-free bread products into my cart. Hello gluten free bagels. Bread. Hamburger rolls. When I got home I remembered that I did away with my bread drawer, and had no place for all of these purchases. So off to the freezer they went -- because ultimately I don't really want to eat them at all. They are too domineering -- they want me too bad and then I want them! It is a toxic relationship, despite what grains are in them or not. I want to be craving foods that are more wholesome and better for me. The bread products are just fillers. I don't want fillers.
I was ravenous on my ride home and kept going through all the scenarios of food I could prepare for lunch. But I said to myself, you need a salad. A nice green big old salad, and it will fill you up, because they are capable of that. So I left all the groceries in their bags and made myself a nice salad with a little cheese and sunflower seeds and chopped up red pepper. That is all I could manage to get in because I was truly starved!
The deal I made with myself as I ate several sandwiches over the holiday, was that I would return to my regularly scheduled programming once Monday hit. So when the siren song of bread filled my ears, I could see, in conjunction with the fact I didn't balloon up and gain a ton, that I was going to head down that path of no return. The bread path. The proof is the fact that I bought a ton of it!
I was there to buy vegetables and meat and fruit. But I was stuck on the bread aisle. I just found it interesting that just a small diversion down the wrong path could put me right back there. True, I wasn't going to eat regular bread. But still. I don't need bread. I don't need it! (I also bought wheat free pasta. Again. why? I don't want to eat any of that filler stuff right now.) Just very, very interesting and a good lesson. OH! And I bought gluten free waffles! I was obsessed! Obsessed, I tell ya!
I just need to get back into my routine and head down the losing path (the weight losing path, that is!) and run as far away from that big bad bread path as I can.
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